Theme of the Month

FEBRUARY

 

DIGNITY/PRIDE

 

Background:

 

Posted on the Internet June 2000 by a high school student:

I will be a junior in a high school in Massachusetts next year and I have this major disappointment. You see, the current valedictorian in my class is a fake, and so are some of the top tier students. I see them cheating, taking easy courses and getting A’s. I take the harder courses and don’t cheat and I am ranked 13 out of 675 students in my class. My college goal is to get into MIT. I have dreams in my sleep almost every day what it would be like to go there. But I don’t have a chance of getting in. all those fake top tier students have stolen that from me. Would anyone be able to help me out. I live in a poor household and I really need help. I am so mad.

 

In November 1999, a 15 year old Chicago schoolboy was charged with aggravated battery at his championship hockey game against his long standing rivals. The bell had just sounded, ending the game, and the players were leaving the ice on the way to their dressing rooms when the boy began to charge toward an opponent who had just scored the winning goal. The boys had played hard against each other, but somehow his opponent’s fair-and-square victory was more than this boy could tolerate, so he decided to get even by giving in to a momentary impulse of savage aggression. He hit the star player full speed from behind with his shoulder sending the boy hard headfirst into the sideboards. The collision snapped 15 year old Neal Goss’s spinal cord and paralyzed him from the chest down. (Who had their Pride/Dignity in this situation?)

 

WHAT CAN WE DO TO ENCOURAGE DIGNITY/PRIDE?

 

-         Demand that your students treat each other fairly to enhance their own dignity/pride.

-         You must treat your own students fairly to enhance their own dignity/pride.

-         Encourage fair play in all activities.

-         Encourage students to demand that everyone be treated fairly regardless of the situation.

-         Encourage students that when they lessen someone else’s dignity/pride they are also lessening their own dignity/pride.

 

Discussion:

 

-Role models: Are parents modeling justice and fairness that lead to dignity/pride? Sports figures often shockingly display a “win at all cost” attitude. Throwing at a batter, illegal blocks, biting off an opponents ear. Too often the role model ends up being some punk who is looked up to because he uses violence to solve his problems.

 

-Emphasis on Competition: Have you heard “Cheating is OK if I don’t get caught”? Have you known coaches who teach illegal tactics to win games? Competition doesn’t just create “character” it often reveals it. Are kids learning positive values such as sharing, compromise or mutual problem solving? Are we living in a cutthroat society where anything goes?

 

 

-Be a strong example of treating people fairly. How do you treat neighbors, strangers, others outside your group? Do you take sides? Do you show favoritism? Do you admit mistakes? Are your expectations realistic?

 

-Expect and demand fairness. Set aside your selfish desires. You don’t always have to get what you want.

 

-Be willing to compromise. You are willing to give up a little of what you want and so does the other person. Negotiation doesn’t always mean you HAVE to compromise especially if it goes against your values or affects your safety.

 

-Be willing to apologize when you are wrong and to say you are sorry. Do you? Do others to you? How about Parents-teachers-adults? How does it make you feel when others won’t do it?

 

-Do we understand that when we take away someone’s Dignity/Pride by being unfair or cruel we are also losing our own Dignity/Pride.

 

 

Discussion: How to deal with an issue you consider to be unfair?

 

-Calm down – don’t be confrontational.

 

-Clarify your feelings. i.e.: Frustration, anger, sadness, fear, etc.

 

-Tell your side of the story and listen to their side of the story.

 

-Try to find out what caused the problem. i.e.: Emotions, prejudice, cultural differences, legal issues, etc.

 

-Work out a solution.

 

-You cannot change every situation but you can be a positive influence.

 

 

WHAT FAIR PEOPLE DO:

 

Stick up for others when they are treated unfairly.

 

Play by the rules and don’t try to change them in the middle of the game.

 

Keep an open mind and listen to all sides before judging.

 

Compromise so that everyone gets a fair share.

 

Takes turns and shares.

 

Acts fairly at all times even when you are unsupervised.

 

 

AS A PERSON WHO HAS DIGNITY/PRIDE …..…

 

  1. Do you delight in the opportunity to serve others.

 

  1. Do you wait patiently for your turn.

 

  1. Do you blame others carelessly.

 

  1. Are you willing to compromise in order to have everyone’s needs met.

 

  1. Are you open minded; listen to all sides before forming an opinion.

 

  1. Do you displays good sportsmanship - win or lose.

 

  1. Do you willingly shares possessions without enticement or reminders.

 

  1. Do you try to solve problems peacefully and fairly.

 

  1. Do you play by the rules and not try to change the rules to gain an advantage.

 

  1. Do you look out for the rights of others to ensure they are treated equally and fairly.